ghost castle

i'm sorry

i feel so sorry for the people in my life. i have such pity for them. i feel their sorrow and disappointment radiating out, draining the warmth from their lives.

i'm so sorry for my parents. investing so much time and energy, into what? i'm sorry for my brother, caring, protecting, what? i'm sorry for my friends, trusting, confiding in, loving, who?

i'm sorry for making you care. i'm sorry for failing you as much as i've failed myself. i'm sorry for growing into nothing over such impossible lengths of time.

it's like throwing your valuables into a sinkhole. so much effort that could have been better spent, so much love that would be better put elsewhere. people care, people try, people fight, and for what? at the end of it all, the only thing they have is a disappointment. the only thing they have is a sinkhole.

the only thing they're left with

is me.