i want love. more than anything. i want to be loved. i don't know what love feels like. i had a crush, once. but that's it. i don't know what it's like to be held, to be seen, to be important to someone beyond words. i've been an island for nearly my whole life. it's my fault, mostly. i marooned myself here. but it doesn't matter much now, why i am where i am. all that really matters is the silence in my heart. the emptiness in my bed. the coldness on my lips.